I used to love Christmas. I don’t anymore and this year it was stolen from me. My late husband’s brother invited two of my three sons to join them for Christmas in San Diego without my knowledge. Not that they would spend it with me, but knowing I was not invited and my third son was not invited, hurt. I am happy that they will get together but so sad that they did not bother to even let me know, so hurt my feelings.
What is Christmas? Is it about love? Is it about family? Anymore, I don’t know what it is about. My husband’s family decided they hated me this last year for reasons I will never really understand, so we don’t have them coming for Christmas. I feel the love is gone for the holidays. I feel I have lost my family for the holidays. I am so sad for the holidays and they no longer exist for me.
I have the fun minions in the driveway, the decorated tree in the house and presents under the tree for part of the family, but the joy of Christmas is gone for me.
As you grow older, are you the forgotten part of Christmas? Do your children no longer care about you at Christmas? Where is the Christ in Christmas? It is gone. I feel more alone tonight, on Christmas Eve than I have felt in years. I have one son coming tomorrow for Christmas dinner, but the other two can’t bother. I turned off my cell phone because I don’t want to be disappointed that no one will call.
I hope you are happier than I am on Christmas. For me, it is one of the saddest days of the years.